Mo' Neighbors, Mo' Problems.
Last Sunday at 4AM I was woken from a very deep sleep by screaming and shouting from somewhere outside my bedroom window, as recounted HERE. I listened to it for about 10 minutes thinking it would quiet down - that the people would get it out of their system and go inside or leave, or whatever.
It didn't quiet down. From what I heard it sounded like a woman was venting, or perhaps screaming at a man, and someone else was consoling her, with statements like: "He's an asshole," "He's a fucking cunt," and "You don't have to take that from him," and "No you're a bitch." Granted those aren't direct quotes, but something along those lines, the last one sounding like it came from a man's voice, hence the assumption that someone was fighting with their significant other.
Since it was 4AM and since it was loud enough to wake me from my sleep I called the police to come and investigate. At the time I was thinking it was a drunk couple fighting and one person siding with her girlfriend, or something along those lines. And, since I have a couple of neighbors in a different location who like to fight at all hours of the day and night, I thought it was them.
Fifteen minutes later the screaming was still going on so I finally stepped outside to make sure no one was fighting in the parking lot or in the yard somewhere. What I discovered was the original address I gave to the police was incorrect, that particular household wasn't outside and not making noise. In fact it was coming from the other side of the building.
Oh, I should explain: I live in a condo. Each building is an eight-plex in the 'burbs. Normally a quiet neighborhood where children play in the common areas and people are typically respectful of their neighbors. I don't live downtown, near a bar or on a major street, I live in the suburbs surrounded by $300,000+ homes, a nice little park and a golf course.
So, I called the police back to inform them I originally gave them the wrong address. Hey, I'll admit when I'm wrong. As it turned out, the local patrol cars were already in the neighborhood, had heard the noise themselves and followed it to the source.
From inside my home I heard the resident of the home thanking the police for showing up. At that point I thought maybe the police did indeed break up a domestic abuse action. And then more screaming, "Why can't my nosy neighbors leave me the fuck alone?! Why? Why can't they mind their own fucking business!?" And the police officer asking her to calm down. It was now a little after 4:30AM.
Then I heard more screaming by her as her voice got more and more quiet followed by one officer saying, "Michelle, please come back. Michelle, please come back here and talk to us." I had to imagine she'd walked off, possibly to cool off or just get away from the stress of the moment.
Then I heard pounding like someone was slamming their fist into cars or kicking fenders. That's when I began to worry that "Michelle" had gotten away from the police and started hitting cars at random hoping to damage the car of the person responsible for calling the police. My truck and motorcycle are parked on that side of the building, very near to "Michelle's" front door. Those just happen to be the closes spots to where I live and where I was parked the before going to bed. I don't know if anyone was arrested or detained or if the police took any other action aside from just knocking on her door.
Now, I should also explain: I met "Michelle" when she first moved into the neighborhood and not under great circumstances. My friend heard someone in her unit arguing loudly when "Michelle" was moving into the unit. As my friend described it, they were screaming and yelling at each other as they unloaded furniture and boxes into her new home. A couple of days later the owner of that unit came by to fix something and asked for help and since I was available, I helped him. I'd let him know that I hadn't met his renter but my friend did hear them fighting when they moved in. And while he was on site he heard "Michelle's" two dogs, mini-Pinschers, yapping away at everything. Apparently he called her to complain about the dogs (which weren't on her lease) and to let her know that someone heard the argument when she moved in.
At this time, I still had no idea who had moved next door, whether it was a single person; a male, female, both; young, old, black, white, redhead or what. Then came a lady, Hispanic by the look of her, who came over and asked me if I lived here. When I admitted I do she then started screaming and yelling at me about invading her privacy, tattling on her, harassing her, etc. After listening to her for a few minutes I was finally able to get her to calm down and I explained the situation: the owner came over, he heard your dogs and, "yes, I mentioned to him that my friend had overheard a screaming fight while you were moving in. It was mentioned in passing, not a report." I explained, no one's keeping tabs on you, but this this a condo community, people are going to notice behavior like that.
"Michelle" then apologized, said it was her 19 year old son and his girlfriend who were helping her move and they were arguing. She also explained how she was Latino and "we're a passionate people."
As if "passionate" was an excuse to accost a stranger.
But, no harm, no foul. She and I ended up talking for about a half hour and we parted ways on a friendly footing. Over the coming months I met her husband (they were separated, but trying to work it out), her son, his girlfriend in passing and had the occasional conversation with "Michelle" whenever I ran across her in the parking lot. Granted, this wasn't much, a handful of times in the past six months; less than I see some of my neighbors and more than I see others. It's called living in a close environment.
One day this summer I came around the block from walking Charlie and Rufus to have a British Bulldog jump through "Michelle's" window and come after Charlie. Apparently "Michelle" was watching her husband's dog while he was out of town and had gone to work leaving the window wide open. Like I said, it's a quiet neighborhood.
The bulldog ended up wondering off and I spent the next 30 minutes crisscrossing the neighborhood on my bicycle trying to find it so it didn't get lost or killed. I came across "Michelle" when she came home, just happening to come around the corner when "Michelle" pulled up in her car. I explained what happened and said I'd continue searching. Luckily someone found her dog and called the number on the tag and the dog was returned.
That was the last time I had anything resembling a conversation with her and that was months ago. There was one other occasion, also on a Sunday morning, when I heard screaming coming from her house, and again it sounded like after a night out drinking, someone complaining and someone consoling. But, since it was a first and not a regular occurrence I didn't call the police or even bring it up with her when I saw her in the parking lot.
Then last Sunday.
Today I learned she's telling the condominium management company that I'm stalking her. Apparently, calling the police on a possible domestic abuse situation equals stalking. She didn't even call the manager's office, she contacted the parent company citing she thought the management was on my side. Since I bypassed the condo management and called the police directly the management is staying out of it.
It's just weird.
I get told by the police to not get myself involved, to call them whenever I see an issue that needs addressing and when I do I'm a stalker? Now I have to be on guard whenever I come and go because my vehicles are parked in front of her home; when I'm out walking the dogs or whenever. I'm tempted to confront her like she confronted me when she thought I called her owner on her, but I know that's just fuel for her fire. I don't know how she assumed it was me that called the police or why she thinks I'm a stalker, but she had no problem confronting me once, when we were strangers, and not now that we know each other. Heck, I'd even understand if she brought her son or (ex) husband as muscle or protection.
And whatever happened to personal accountability? If you're loud enough to wake your neighbors in the wee early morning and the neighbors complain, is that the neighbor's fault or your own? When did we become a people who don't take responsibility for our actions, instead blaming everyone around us for our own faults?
It didn't quiet down. From what I heard it sounded like a woman was venting, or perhaps screaming at a man, and someone else was consoling her, with statements like: "He's an asshole," "He's a fucking cunt," and "You don't have to take that from him," and "No you're a bitch." Granted those aren't direct quotes, but something along those lines, the last one sounding like it came from a man's voice, hence the assumption that someone was fighting with their significant other.
Since it was 4AM and since it was loud enough to wake me from my sleep I called the police to come and investigate. At the time I was thinking it was a drunk couple fighting and one person siding with her girlfriend, or something along those lines. And, since I have a couple of neighbors in a different location who like to fight at all hours of the day and night, I thought it was them.
Fifteen minutes later the screaming was still going on so I finally stepped outside to make sure no one was fighting in the parking lot or in the yard somewhere. What I discovered was the original address I gave to the police was incorrect, that particular household wasn't outside and not making noise. In fact it was coming from the other side of the building.
Oh, I should explain: I live in a condo. Each building is an eight-plex in the 'burbs. Normally a quiet neighborhood where children play in the common areas and people are typically respectful of their neighbors. I don't live downtown, near a bar or on a major street, I live in the suburbs surrounded by $300,000+ homes, a nice little park and a golf course.
So, I called the police back to inform them I originally gave them the wrong address. Hey, I'll admit when I'm wrong. As it turned out, the local patrol cars were already in the neighborhood, had heard the noise themselves and followed it to the source.
From inside my home I heard the resident of the home thanking the police for showing up. At that point I thought maybe the police did indeed break up a domestic abuse action. And then more screaming, "Why can't my nosy neighbors leave me the fuck alone?! Why? Why can't they mind their own fucking business!?" And the police officer asking her to calm down. It was now a little after 4:30AM.
Then I heard more screaming by her as her voice got more and more quiet followed by one officer saying, "Michelle, please come back. Michelle, please come back here and talk to us." I had to imagine she'd walked off, possibly to cool off or just get away from the stress of the moment.
Then I heard pounding like someone was slamming their fist into cars or kicking fenders. That's when I began to worry that "Michelle" had gotten away from the police and started hitting cars at random hoping to damage the car of the person responsible for calling the police. My truck and motorcycle are parked on that side of the building, very near to "Michelle's" front door. Those just happen to be the closes spots to where I live and where I was parked the before going to bed. I don't know if anyone was arrested or detained or if the police took any other action aside from just knocking on her door.
Now, I should also explain: I met "Michelle" when she first moved into the neighborhood and not under great circumstances. My friend heard someone in her unit arguing loudly when "Michelle" was moving into the unit. As my friend described it, they were screaming and yelling at each other as they unloaded furniture and boxes into her new home. A couple of days later the owner of that unit came by to fix something and asked for help and since I was available, I helped him. I'd let him know that I hadn't met his renter but my friend did hear them fighting when they moved in. And while he was on site he heard "Michelle's" two dogs, mini-Pinschers, yapping away at everything. Apparently he called her to complain about the dogs (which weren't on her lease) and to let her know that someone heard the argument when she moved in.
At this time, I still had no idea who had moved next door, whether it was a single person; a male, female, both; young, old, black, white, redhead or what. Then came a lady, Hispanic by the look of her, who came over and asked me if I lived here. When I admitted I do she then started screaming and yelling at me about invading her privacy, tattling on her, harassing her, etc. After listening to her for a few minutes I was finally able to get her to calm down and I explained the situation: the owner came over, he heard your dogs and, "yes, I mentioned to him that my friend had overheard a screaming fight while you were moving in. It was mentioned in passing, not a report." I explained, no one's keeping tabs on you, but this this a condo community, people are going to notice behavior like that.
"Michelle" then apologized, said it was her 19 year old son and his girlfriend who were helping her move and they were arguing. She also explained how she was Latino and "we're a passionate people."
As if "passionate" was an excuse to accost a stranger.
But, no harm, no foul. She and I ended up talking for about a half hour and we parted ways on a friendly footing. Over the coming months I met her husband (they were separated, but trying to work it out), her son, his girlfriend in passing and had the occasional conversation with "Michelle" whenever I ran across her in the parking lot. Granted, this wasn't much, a handful of times in the past six months; less than I see some of my neighbors and more than I see others. It's called living in a close environment.
One day this summer I came around the block from walking Charlie and Rufus to have a British Bulldog jump through "Michelle's" window and come after Charlie. Apparently "Michelle" was watching her husband's dog while he was out of town and had gone to work leaving the window wide open. Like I said, it's a quiet neighborhood.
The bulldog ended up wondering off and I spent the next 30 minutes crisscrossing the neighborhood on my bicycle trying to find it so it didn't get lost or killed. I came across "Michelle" when she came home, just happening to come around the corner when "Michelle" pulled up in her car. I explained what happened and said I'd continue searching. Luckily someone found her dog and called the number on the tag and the dog was returned.
That was the last time I had anything resembling a conversation with her and that was months ago. There was one other occasion, also on a Sunday morning, when I heard screaming coming from her house, and again it sounded like after a night out drinking, someone complaining and someone consoling. But, since it was a first and not a regular occurrence I didn't call the police or even bring it up with her when I saw her in the parking lot.
Then last Sunday.
Today I learned she's telling the condominium management company that I'm stalking her. Apparently, calling the police on a possible domestic abuse situation equals stalking. She didn't even call the manager's office, she contacted the parent company citing she thought the management was on my side. Since I bypassed the condo management and called the police directly the management is staying out of it.
It's just weird.
I get told by the police to not get myself involved, to call them whenever I see an issue that needs addressing and when I do I'm a stalker? Now I have to be on guard whenever I come and go because my vehicles are parked in front of her home; when I'm out walking the dogs or whenever. I'm tempted to confront her like she confronted me when she thought I called her owner on her, but I know that's just fuel for her fire. I don't know how she assumed it was me that called the police or why she thinks I'm a stalker, but she had no problem confronting me once, when we were strangers, and not now that we know each other. Heck, I'd even understand if she brought her son or (ex) husband as muscle or protection.
And whatever happened to personal accountability? If you're loud enough to wake your neighbors in the wee early morning and the neighbors complain, is that the neighbor's fault or your own? When did we become a people who don't take responsibility for our actions, instead blaming everyone around us for our own faults?
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