People Who Think, or Don't Think
I have two friends, both of which are in technical/engineering type industries. These friends have met each other, but they only know each other through me. One friend, the guy, is reclusive and a social misfit. Most of my other friends have asked that I not bring him around too much. The other claims to be a social savant, but then throws a tantrum when you ask her why she didn't talk to anyone at the party, or clung to you or just the people she knows already. as she puts it: "I am really social with my friends, but not people I don't know." Which kind of puts the damper on gaining new friends, I would think.
But the point of this post is to this: both friends are in rational/logical industries and they try to tackle their lives in rational ways (which I do as well) but when they enter a situation beyond the "rational" they're uncomfortable.
For instance:
1. My female friend tries to rationalize everything, but when someone calls her on it, she throws a tantrum. It can be as simple as disagreeing with what she's convinced herself is a rational decision; or, like this morning when she was trying to rationalize why her dog had diarrhea last night, I told her she could hypothesize about it all day but the fact is she might not ever know. Instead of accepting the fact that she can't know what caused her dog's diarrhea, (could it have been all the turkey leftovers?) she decided to "yell" at me for telling her she might not ever know, but the dog is acting fine and therefore it's probably nothing serious.
2. My guy friend, on the other hand, is the exact opposite. He just assumes everyone thinks like he does. For example: we read the same types of books (sci-fi/fantasy). He prefers the simple quick plots where there is a quest or a task that needs done and the characters attempt that quest or task. I do not. I read the strong stories with political scheming, in-depth plots, layers like onions and strong character and plot development. And yet, whenever I ask him if he's read anything good he always (always!) pushes the same 4 or 5 books on me. How many times do we have to go over the same conversation that I don't prefer the same types of stories he does.
My point? It's frustrating when people are socially stunted and can't grasp simple conversational skills.
But the point of this post is to this: both friends are in rational/logical industries and they try to tackle their lives in rational ways (which I do as well) but when they enter a situation beyond the "rational" they're uncomfortable.
For instance:
1. My female friend tries to rationalize everything, but when someone calls her on it, she throws a tantrum. It can be as simple as disagreeing with what she's convinced herself is a rational decision; or, like this morning when she was trying to rationalize why her dog had diarrhea last night, I told her she could hypothesize about it all day but the fact is she might not ever know. Instead of accepting the fact that she can't know what caused her dog's diarrhea, (could it have been all the turkey leftovers?) she decided to "yell" at me for telling her she might not ever know, but the dog is acting fine and therefore it's probably nothing serious.
2. My guy friend, on the other hand, is the exact opposite. He just assumes everyone thinks like he does. For example: we read the same types of books (sci-fi/fantasy). He prefers the simple quick plots where there is a quest or a task that needs done and the characters attempt that quest or task. I do not. I read the strong stories with political scheming, in-depth plots, layers like onions and strong character and plot development. And yet, whenever I ask him if he's read anything good he always (always!) pushes the same 4 or 5 books on me. How many times do we have to go over the same conversation that I don't prefer the same types of stories he does.
My point? It's frustrating when people are socially stunted and can't grasp simple conversational skills.
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