Jasonisms

So, that happened last Saturday night. There I was, it was Saturday night, I had no other plans other than sitting there flipping through the television channels instead of doing something productive. I'd finally settled on The Animal Planet, a show called Mermaids: the Body Found .   My attention was split between the television show, doing something on the computer that wasn't going to change the world and listening to my friend talk about … whatever it was she was talking about. Not that I wasn't listening, it's just that after the rest of the evening played out it really wasn't that important enough to recall. The clock read 9:40. I know this because my eyes were already drooping and I was wondering if it was too early to crawl into bed, especially on a Saturday evening. Then we heard it. Between my friend talking and the television trying to convince us that humans were closer to Mermaids than great apes - shouting. What was that? Was it ...

For about a week, my dog Rufus and my roommate's dog, Charlie, had been running out into a nearby field and rolling around in something putrid. I didn't know what it was at first. Then one day I decided to walk across the field instead of around it and Charlie ran immediately over to whatever  it was and began rolling. I walked over and found the mostly decayed body of a cat. I didn't think anything of it since cats die all the time, especially in an area where coyotes have been known to traverse and fox have been known to hunt. It happens. And then a few days later I saw the sign posted on a lamp post a couple of blocks away. I didn't know exactly what to do at this point, whether to call and be the bearer of bad news or leave it be and let the person(s) live in blissful ignorance. However, since I don't like not knowing things, myself, I decided to call. I called the first number on the flyer and left a message for Amber tellin...